I choose to end with the beginning, and start with the end.

I’m empty. Empty for words, thoughts and energy. Empty for will and life. I feel tired. What’s life about? Is life about living and doing stuff? Or is it about working and make money? I don’t know. The insecurity is sneaking up on me. Insecurity and fear all this without me knowing what am causing it. Life is fighting against me and I feel a pressure. A pressure to perform, a pressure to prove and a pressure to see things through. I have a meeting tomorrow, even if the meeting is scaring me because I don’t know what I want. I don’t want to go and the insecurity is sneaking up on me again.

People say that I’m strong because I speak about it, but I am really that strong? When I’m alone I cry. Is that being strong? Deep inside I have no meaning with my life, but also no energy to do something with it.

What does it even mean to be strong? I choose to end with the beginning, and start with the end. I’m empty. Empty for words, thoughts and energy. Empty for will and life. I feel tired.

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